The old lady bikini pageant is on, bitches!
For all of you who didn’t get the memo, middle-age chicks are supposed to upload photos of themselves bikini-clad in their bathrooms.
Something is wrong with my camera. My tits are not that small!
Brave starlet Demi Moore went first followed by Soap Opera queen Lisa Rinna. I’ve tossed my picture in the mix.
I had to use a sepia tint because the steam on the bathroom mirror gave my skin the fetching look of leprosy. I also added a seascape since toilets are gross and subbed a starfish for my camera because taking a picture of yourself in the mirror is so freaking LAME.
So, it’s your turn. Email me your photos at email@example.com in your swimwear in your johns. Dudes are also invited.
Remember this is a contest. High marks given for visible stretch marks, arm flab, beer guts, and thunder thighs.
Thanks, 0whole1! I was feeling lonely up there. 🙂
Round of applause for the Grumpy Lion! Woo-hoo!
Hysterical Raisins represents!
Shanks in Georgia steps up: