Steele the One

♪♪ Steele Away to Jesus ♪♪

I’m not defined by this job. When this job is over I will go back to doing something else. But God, I really believe, has placed me here for a reason because who else and why else would you do this unless there’s something inside of you that says right now you need to be here to do this?” Michael Steele via Think Progress

For funzies, let’s say RNC chairman Michael Steele is right, and God’s ultimate plan is inescapably tied to Steele being the legitimate face of the GOP.

Let’s review what Deity has in mind as indicated by this last week’s events:

While promoting his new book Monday, Steele told Fox News “Our platform is one of the best political documents that’s been written in the last 25 years. Honest injun on that.”

Oh, yeah. Freelz. He said it.

Thursday Former Speaker of the House (I know, from dinosaur times) Newt Gingrich addressed the Republican party’s bigotry issue when speaking of Steele: “Michael Steele makes a number of old-time Republicans very nervous. He comes out of a different background. He went to seminary … he’s African-American … But I think he’s pretty close to what we need. He’s different, he’s gutsy and he’s going to make a number of Republicans mad.”

Spoken like a true prophet, Newt.

Representative Tom Cole (R-OK) is pretty pissed off about the “Injun” remark, and said so Friday.  And teabagging activist and radio host Dana Loesch is outraged that Steele stood her up for an interview so he could promote the above mentioned book. She called Steele a “butt sniffer.”

Totally immature. My kind of Republican…except for the teabagger thing.

So, in sum, Steele using racist language subtracts potential minority conservatives minuses non-bigoted Republicans plus Steele standing up tea party faction minuses some hard core conservatives plus Newt stating Steele is what the party needs equals what?

In honor of Newt’s conversion to Catholicism, I’m gonna call God’s plan for the GOP Ex Unus Ut Nusquam.

That’s Latin for From One to Nothing.