You know it’s bad when Fox News mourns what’s being done to the environment!

Oily Bird cannot regulate its body temperature. Ingestion as it attempts to clean its feathers will result in organ damage.

BP’s next shot-in-the-dark plan for containing the black death unleashed in the Gulf of Mexico:  Top Kill.

Top Kill will attempt to inject “heavy fluids” into BP’s thousands of gallons of oil per day leak, then the company will attempt to cap the leak with cement.  This was a method for capping burning wells in Kuwait, but it’s never been tried in water this deep.

The  LA Times defines heavy fluids as “heavy drilling mud which is twice the density of water.”

On a failure/success continuum of “1 to 10,”  a BP spokesman says Top Kill is “above a 5…a 6 or 7.”

I imagine BP conjured such statistical precision in the same places they conjured Top Hat, Junk Shot, and Top Kill: up their asses.

You can watch catastrophic human failure HERE live!


21 thoughts on “Top Hat, Junk Shot, and Other Slogans by which to Kill a Body of Water

  1. Y’all is fucked, doncha know?

    Did you catch Jindal live yesterday whining about having to wait the past two weeks for the Corps to give him a permit so he can build berms to keep the oil out? Whatthefuck is he waiting for those clowns for? They’re telling him they have ‘environmental concerns’ about the berms? Are all these people complete fucking braindead zombie idiots?!

    I think the only people who really get it are the fishermen. Everybody else is playing fucking politics and money games.

    The Feds should be busting up BP, arresting their execs and the MMS shitheads, and shutting down every well outside of 300 feet. If not every Gulf well, period.

    Renewable energy should be declared a matter of national security, the naysayers should be shut down, and the Feds should be running a Manhattan Project to get renewables up and running.

    But no. Ain’t gonna happen. We are held hostage by moral, ethical, and mental midgets with their hands in each other’s pockets and their dicks up each other’s asses.

    We’all is fucked, all of us.

    • Everything you say! Jesus Christ, BP dumps Corexit 9500 (known to damage the CNS, the liver, and kidneys)…but a berm may be dangerous to the environment. I just read WashPost article about the macabre cascade effect on the marshlands. Quite depressing, a chain of death, death, and more death. Nothing anyone can do.

      Yes…we are fucked.

  2. bp needs to look for real scientists and engineers instead of p.r. assholes who sit around all day thinking up names for their strategeries that sound like fred astaire or quentin tarentino movies.

    • I’ll take over the PR division…i’m already thinking of a 30 second spot. Ahem:

      Indeed, we here at British Psychopaths take environmental and public rape quiet seriously, chaps. And money. We take that seriously, too. We haven’t buggered up the world enough; so, BP will now lay claim on the sun. It’s no longer free. Presently, sun usage will be payable by the honor system. Please send cash or check for all units of solar energy enjoyed during an average day. Thank you. Now piss off.

  3. I have a couple of interesting links for you. One is about testing done on the Louisiana coast and the amount of benzene and other chemicals showing up in extremely high amounts in the air. Title is Air Tests from the Louisiana coast reveal human health threats from the oil disaster. The site is http://www.southernstudies.org/2010/05/air-tests-from-the-louisiana-coast-reveal-human-health-threats-from-the-oil-disaster.html The other has info. about the BP dispersal chemical at http://www.notanotherconspiracy.com/search/label/deepwater%2horizon Don’t let the site name dissuade you-has alot of scientific info.

  4. JFC! It just keeps getting worse and worse, don’t it? The richest country in the world has just proved it’s the greediest, careless, uncompassionate(?), stupidest, most fucked up one too! This goddamn mess is going on, yet the finale of Lost and 24 are getting alot of the press? USA should be called FUSA!

  5. It’s so depressing to see our beautiful gulf beings destroyed more every day because some :”company man” fucked up the proper drilling regimine, not once (ruined the first bore), but twice! And now hurricane season is quickly upon us. Just wait untill a storm surge brings this slop way up on the land. And what about water table contamination? It’s ironic that one of the main ingredients in drilling mud is ground-up U.S. currency.

  6. Had on the Weather Channel earlier and they said, ‘We gotta keep an eye on this one out in the Atlantic! The season will be starting soon, but it may start even earlier!’. Then they are saying there could be 16 named storms with who knows how many in the Gulf and those affecting us on the East Coast. Yes, my dears, we are fucked!

  7. Junk Shot. Doesn’t that sound like a good description of porn sex or a good porn title? Makes you wonder how much they pay the person who comes up with these titles? Have on the hearing right now on C-SPAN about BP and the fiasco. They have had 439 violations and $20 million in fines due to cost cutting, according to Sen. Debbie Stabenow (D-MI) who, bless her heart, has more balls than the men in charge of this so far. The Democratic female senators are the ones with no qualms with saying get the scum of BP to part with $10 billion of their blood money-not millions-and clean this shit the fuck up!

  8. Hi! I got 2 more links for you, then I’ll shut up for a bit. I’ve been reading as much as I can about the Gulf Leak and wish more scientists would be featured in coverage on this. I did find an interesting story on a whistle blower, Kenneth Abbott, who told BP their rig Atlantis is at risk of being an even bigger disaster than this. He was on 60 Minutes recently. The story is Whistleblower Sues To Stop Another BP Rig From Operating by Abrahm Lustgarten of ProPublica. Link is http://www.propublica.com/content/whistleblower-sues-to-stop-another-bp-rig-operating Another blog Antemedius.com has good coverage too, including the same story.

    • You’re going to be the go-to expert if you keep this up!

      How hard is it to temporarily draft the finest engineering and physics-oriented minds in America, stick them in one room, and say, SOLVE THIS for your country! ….like last month already!

  9. For what it’s worth, which isn’t much since the people who can ‘change’ things aren’t really listening, here’s what I piggybacked onto a Redford appeal to Obama to stop Shell from drilling exploratory wells in the Arctic —–

    You and your people are behaving like blind fools. Instead of doing what’s right for the most important matter, the environment and the climate, you give away our money to banks and rich people, and you diddle and dawdle while the Gulf Coast is destroyed by a company that the Federal government and the politicians, yourself included, are far too cozy with.

    The earth, the environment, the global climate cannot be bargained with, cannot be compromised with, cannot be treated politically. The natural world does not care. It does not bargain. It does not sit down at fancy tables and agree to compromises. You allowed BP to lie for its permits, and now the Louisiana marshes, at the very least, are destroyed. You are allowing Shell to conduct exploratory drilling in one of the harshest environments on earth, one that, should an ‘accident’ happen, Shell and all the government’s men will not be able to fix. You allow wingnuts like Senator Inhofe to promulgate lies and deceit in the service of his oil paymasters, and the entire earth suffers.

    What is happening on earth now, in large part due to the United States using too many resources too wastefully and failing to provide solid leadership to the world by action and example, is nothing less than a matter of national security, and should be treated as such. The country, indeed the world, needs the modern day equivalent of a Manhattan Project operating under a powerful national security mandate. The Inhofes must be quelled, not compromised with, not listened to, but quelled by whatever means necessary. The oil companies must be dragged under the heel of the government, and the people must be forced into sacrifice and into the process of fighting global warming and fighting the culture that brought us the Deep Horizon catastrophe.

    Human civilization depends on it. Our lives depend on it. Failing to meet this challenge, and meet it hard and head-on, guarantees that your grandchildren will, if born at all, be born into a dying world of misery and pain and suffering.

    Failure to act, failure to take seriously the ongoing catastrophe of global warming and the continued use of fossil fuels, will make you and the crop of strutting, ego-driven politicians in Washington and the other capitols of the world the object of the last curses of the last dying humans on the planet.

  10. Amen, Ric and thanks for posting that! We have had on CNN since 4 and when they showed Anderson Cooper, Carville and Matalin, Jindal, Billy Nungesser and a few others in the air boat, and that eerie silence, the oil in the marsh, the dead cane and grasses, and the fact all life there is dead, then the fact nobody there is cleaning it up-if it doesn’t upset you, you must be dead!

    • Joan, did you see the video yesterday of the areas they were cleaning up? A few men using garden size shovel and hefting the oil sludge into clear garbage bags. The marshes are soaked 12 miles deep in!

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