The California Highway Patrol finds out the icky way that sometimes an anal vibrator is just an anal vibrator…and not a suicide bomb.
Seriously, boys. Does Mr. Faces-of-Meth LOOK like he has a single, goddamn commitment to any ideology at all? Any?? Ya’ll need to work on those mad profiling skillz.
CHP busted Steven Ferrini on a drug charge.
Blow me over with a bunny fart.
Officers discovered an on/off switch in Ferrini’s pocket during a search. The switch had a wire extending around into the 60-year-old’s bunghole. The suspect then thought he’d be funny with law enforcement by talking about his expertise in explosives. The El Dorado County bomb squad was summoned.
If I was the evidence collector, this’d be about the time I’d fucking quit!
3 hours later…the team determined the device was safe.
Biggest asshole ever!!!!!!!