I’m counting on half the clicks to this post coming from people who think I forgot to put the word “is” between warming and for.

Yes, the dumbasses!

…you who stand around on an exceptionally cold January day or unseasonably cool summer day in Beavershot, West Virginia and say to compadres, “Hyuck, hyuck. Yep, it’s global warming, ulright.” thinking how fucking clever you are!

You know who you are, fuckleheads!

You’re the ones whose education system delivered you a big, fat intellect fail while promoting you to the next grade level anyway.

Some call you Republicans.

Well, Greenman of Youtube can help you understand why you’re so retarded!

Yay, Greenman! Youtube’s like TV, so the citizens of Idiocracy may actually get it!

Or if you like the browbeating you’ve taken so far, you ignorant sacks of raging stupid, lemme splain.

See, morons…

(you spell it “morans”)

You can’t draw a correct conclusion on the climate of the whole damn planet by making a single observation from Beavershot, West Virginia. You can’t make a proper assumption about the climate based on observations in America! Or even China.

There are retards aplenty in China, too! 有減速豐富在中國!

No, you have to take temperature samplings around the whole wide world.  I know that’s a really sciencey thing to get your pea brain around, but that’s how you draw conclusions about the world climate.

And the data collected says, it’s fucking hot!

In fact, it’s so hot that the arctic winds that keep super cold air near the North pole aren’t working.  That’s why it feels colder in Beavershot!  Arctic temps have drifted down to you and Europe and China, but it’s actually warmer at the Arctic.

Did write this all down?  Just watch the video. You like TV.


39 thoughts on “Global Warming for Dumbasses

  1. Pingback: Hilarious and Biting « Social, Economic, Environmental Responsibility

  2. I find it hard to figure out from your post how you really feel about the matter. Perhaps you could state things a little more clearly? 🙂

    Been here? Real Climate Of course that’s just for those folk that can read. And think. And understand science.

  3. AWESOME!!!
    Instead of having this argument with the fucktards I normally do I’m going to send them right to this post to get schooled by you!


    • And what if those bitches sent you this back?

      This republican teacher has a 4 year degree in biochemistry and is trying to draw conclusions about atmospheric science. Guess she got a W for withdraw in scientific method and an F in the import of peer review. (Maybe she thinks the English teacher next door counts as a peer…oh wait, she does!) 😯

      • offer her some arsenic or cyanide. point out to her that she probably weighs about 140 or 150, and the arsenic or cyanide is less than a gram. it’s just a tiny, tiny percentage of what she weighs, so it’s nothing to be afraid of, right?

        • Thank you, Nonnie. A strong analogy!

          When I watched this, she was tripping my bad reasoning alarm. Ding, ding, ding. Ie. nothing mechanistic offered, atmosphere is infinitely more complex than the uniformity of objects in the “presentation,” scale doesn’t translate, etc.

          With a background in chemistry, she knows better. The whole thing is so academically dishonest and oversimplified, I wanna puke.

  4. poor neil cavuto. he keeps saying stupid shit, but he still doesn’t get a hundredth of the attention that the other stooges at faux get.

    p.s. i hear that the rethugs are going to send scott brown out on the capitol steps nekkid, and when his little dinky shrinks, they’ll say it’s proof that it’s still cold out, so global warming isn’t real.

  5. That’s just a bad video. The PPM measurement is only in relation to a million of something. How many millions of air molecules exist in the Earths atmosphere?

    • And as you said on your site, it speaks nothing to “deforestation, the loss of biodiversity, the rising acidity of oceans, the dying off of algae and coral, and the many other factors involved in climate change.”

  6. Extra points for “fuckleheads”.

    This kind of thing makes me wish I had no conscience so I could bilk people shamelessly with my ill-thought out screed-type books.

  7. Pingback: Global warming in a freezing winter « Letters Home

  8. There’s a good piece by Charles Homans in the January/February 2010 Columbia Journalism Review on how TV weathermen have distorted the global warming issue. They’re not trained, practicing climatologists: they’re local weathermen, often not even meterologists. But because they have an audience, and, as Homans notes, are the only people at local TV stations who have even a remote connection to science, they’re considered experts on climate. And who believes their pronouncements? The dunderheads who watch them and think that because they’re on TV they must be smart. That puts the bar for ‘smart’ down at the level of the matchboxes in Monty Python’s Twit of the Year contest. Possibly lower.

    • I’ll read it tonight. Thanks. That’s a sad fact on weather anchors. Like reporters, many tv weather people function to communicate what NOAA or Accuweather or the Hurricane Center in Miami or whoever they listen to tells them and not as actual independent meteorological experts.

  9. When somebody mumbles that well-worn phrase, “So much for global warming …” I usually mumble back, “Ah, yet another lost soul who confuses the weather with ‘climate.'”

  10. Pingback: Global Warming, More Complex Than You Realize « Social, Economic, Environmental Responsibility

  11. From Beaverspot Georgia (not to be confused with Beavershot, West Virginia-though I think I may have been through there once or twice)it went up about 20 degrees in about 4 or 5 hours accompanied by heavy rain,high winds and lightning.So to get to the crux of the situation,the real thing that seems to be overlooked at the heart of the matter is the ever-looming question:
    Is global warming for dumb asses and how do the dumb asses feel about it?

  12. For all is illusion or at least as big an illusion as we need to fit the truth! Maybe that is what hell is really all about…time will tell, unfortunately it will be those who come after us who will be paying the price for our selfish lifestyles! One swallow doesn’t make a summer! and one bad winter doesn’t change the fact that the polar icecaps are melting…melting…melting…fast!
    God help us when they have….

  13. Pingback: Colbert Does Global Warming for Dumbasses « WriteChic Press

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s