911 Bar Ride
Sexiest Mugshot of 2009?

While handsome here is an obvious candidate for the Sexiest Faces of Meth, he has also earned a nomination for Most Bone-headed Call to 911.

Hot contenders, of course, being the drunk dad who couldn’t find his truck with his kid in it and the doofus who called 911 trying to get laid.

Gregory Oras called 911 claiming his ears were bleeding, his nose was broken, he had been assaulted and shot.

All of this was a ruse to get deputies to drive him to another bar.


The Tampa police report says Oras called 911 three times.  When the 37-year-old lush realized things wouldn’t be going his way, he kicked a law enforcement officer in the knees.

Oras then received a courtesy Tasing, 50,000 volts of your ass is going to jail.

He is now being held at the Pinellas County Jail.


14 thoughts on “911, I need your help to bar hop!

  1. All the biggest dumasses live in Florida — Cookie and me excepted, of course. We’re the ones keeping a Red State slightly blue (does that make us Purple People, like something out of a Prince song?)


  2. Yeah, I wanted to say that that was a Tampa thing, then I remembered that we have just as many goofballs in South Florida (again, Cookie and I are excepted — I think :))

    I saw that guy – I was so going to write about his douchebaggery but you got it spot on, girl!

    I live for these moments (don’t judge!)

    • Hey, I too live for these moments. I read another one about a meth head that fell asleep in his car while his, ahem, product was cooking in the lab in the back seat!!!

      Big, big dummies. (But who’s judging?) 😉

    • i am purple, but i think it’s because the heat isn’t working properly, and i’m very cold. i do believe my chad was hanging. i distinctly remember voting that day and thinking that the punch cards were much harder to punch through than they usually were. i still have my sample ballot from that election somewhere.

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