Reindeer Poop Jewelry
Check out this shit.

When I was naughty, my mom would tell me Santa was going to bring me “switches and reindeer poop.”   I had no clue what switches were, but the idea of a stocking full of reindeer poop made me rethink the naughtiness.

Until now!!!

We, the unimaginative, look at reindeer poop and think, ewww, crap.  But some artistic genius didn’t see animal droppings.  He saw Christmas and the chance to turn a buck (hee, hee, buck).

The Miller Park Zoological Society in Bloomington, Illinois made $21,ooo this holiday season selling dime-sized pieces of reindeer poop fashioned as necklaces and Christmas ornaments.

Bleccchhh, choke, gross!

And just how is feces transformed from mere turds to”Magical Reindeer Gems” you wonder?

Well, the reindeer droppings are lovingly dehydrated, dutifully sterilized and carefully spray-painted with happy, sparkly glitter.

You may purchase the poop jewelry right here at the Zootique gift shop online.  The ornaments cost $10 by mail. The necklaces sell for $20 by mail.

I know ya’ll will wanna jump on this.

Unfortunately for my friends abroad, U.S. regulation prohibits literal shit from being shipped out of America.  Sucks for you.  But more for us!



Hope everyone enjoys their holidays!!!


12 thoughts on “Christmas Crap, frealz.

    • No kidding, eh? I’m still reeling from reading about all of those rich welfare queen conservatives on the farm subsidy dole. Geez.

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