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Gary Skoien Beaten by Wife
Build your own Blingee

It’s all fun and games in the children’s nursery and then the wife shows up!

Leave it to Republicans to really twist up a sex story.

The former chairman of Illinois’ Cook County Republican Party denies that his dear, dear friends were hookers.

Lemme back up.

Palatine Township GOP committeeman Gary Skoien called the cops on his wife after she started beating him to death with a plastic toy guitar.

That must have been the first thing handy after she caught him playing doctor with two women.

The assault happened Sunday at 1 a.m, according to a Barrington-Inverness police report.  Mrs. Skoien allegedly found her husband in her children’s playroom banging a couple of prostitutes.

Mr Skoien says that’s not true; they were just friendly friends with orificial benefits.

Mrs. Skoien is charged with misdemeanor domestic battery.  Mr. Skoien took out a restraining order against her.  No charges for him.

Oh, that’s fair!

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11 thoughts on “GOP Threesome Bust

  1. friends with benefits, eh? those republicans… such fine, outstanding family men in pursuit only of some happy time.

    • and I love how this procession or Rethug perverts NEVER FOR ONE SECOND stops… it’s not like an anomaly or anything… year after year after year… these self-righteous, holier-than-thou greed-fiend faux-alphas just can’t seem to keep their repressed little members in their pants…

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