St. Mary’s Health Center: Expect Death

Brace yourself, Republicans!  It’s time for a poorgasm!!! Anna Brown’s Missouri home was destroyed by a tornado in January 2010.  She relocated, lost her job, couldn’t pay the bills, lost utilities, got her kids taken away, became homeless and then eventually had to reach out for help at St. Mary’s Health Center because she was [...]

Republican Poor-Gasms Pissing Off Catholics

Eager to seize the White House, Republicans have been working very hard this week on keeping black people and poor women alienated while nurturing their newest estranged relationship with old people.  Well, now Republicans are pissing off Catholics. Nuns, priests, and Catholic college professors wrote a letter to Speaker Boehner, a Catholic, saying how pissed [...]

Breaking News: U.S. Sports Tiniest Penises in North America

Oh, it’s much worse for America.  If it weren’t for Ireland and Romania, we’d have the tiniest penises in the Western world.  But we can always point to the Alabama and Mississippi of penises…India and South Korea.  And China, who’s big now, bitches? Kazakhstan and Saudi Arabia apparently have no penises. I want to know [...]

Cartman Gets A Used Anal Probe

Ewwwwwwwwwww!!!! No, no, no!!!!  This did not happen! A woman is suing a hospital in Oregon for failing to disinfect her ass probe!!!!!! *faint* *wake-up* St. Charles Medical Center had to notify patients that the machine used to clean a colonoscope FAILED to go through the entire disinfection process. …in BEND fucking Oregon, no less!! [...]

Steve King and Fun with Non Sequiturs

ht 0whole1 via Talking Points Memo The Leaders of the 112th’s Cadre of Genius flex their mental muscle for America.  First up, Representative Steve King (R-IA) offers his evidence of the unconstitutionality of health insurance for all Americans being regulated by Interstate Commerce. Cue: King There have always been and likely will always be, babies [...]

Republicans Piss Off the Gods

Thank the Deities of the World that you have me.  I’ve seen the signs, and I’m here to report. Republicans are ready to take over the U.S. House of Representatives in an unholy reign of terror lame.  First item on the agenda: fantasies about butt-fucking the elderly, poor, and middle-class with a threat of a [...]

China’s Alternative Binge and Purge Diet Plan

Personalized Glitter Graphics Ew! Ew! Ew! Ew! Ew! Competition for jobs and the belief a trim figure will land a position have given women in China an idea for hard and fastweight loss: worms. Ew! Ew! Ew! Ew! Ew! A lot of female students eat roundworm eggs to lose weight for job interviews. *retch* *gag* [...]

911 Responders Visit Senator Coburn (Dr. Evil)

ht Think Progress Sexiest 911 Hero, John Feal: Mr. Coburn should be ashamed of himself. Because I think before he was a senator he was a doctor and he took an oath to help people that are sick. He’s going against his oath as a doctor. He can vote any way he wants as a [...]

Evil Douchebag Parade on Steroids

Glitter Graphics One-man death panel, Senator Tom Coburn (R-OK), (a motherfucking doctor) will block life-saving aid to 9-11 first responders who suffer from exposure to deadly toxins because of rescuing imperiled Americans. (Source) Colburn wants to protect the American companies that outsource jobs from taxes. I hope he shits his pants at the airport when [...]

Yay, No Government Regulations: We love poison water!

The Environmental Working Group releases the first nationwide study evaluating the presence of hexavalent chromium in drinking water around America.   Thirty-one of 35 cities tested have chromium-6 on tap. Hack. Choke! Cough…a carcinogen! Forbes Magazine says my city is among the best for water quality, but Birmingham is listed with Miami which is poisonous. Hack. [...]